Life as I know it

"There's far
Too many pressures in reality
With dealing with the pain
The stress and poverty
And i gotta be myself because
There's nobody else for me"


There is no one to depend on, no one to save me or even with whom to pretend I am safe. There is just me and reality and as we know reality is a bitch. I have only myself and my meager and ineffective coping abilities. So I dream, I read, and I write. I take another step hoping that this one will be my final. That good or bad it will finally be over and I can rest and let it all go.

I've lost faith, beliving in "their" reality and in doing so I slowly lose myself. Even as I struggle to achieve some semblance of happiness. Perhaps a cabin in the mountains, a warm crackling fire and the distant sound of water as it meanders down the mountainside. The warmth of the sun as it gently kisses my body, laying on a furry white rug with the gentle smell of honeysuckle and stargazer lillies teasing my nose. I am alone, but content. safe from any and all that would cause me harm.

I rest.